Updated: May 28, 2020
What is Life Coaching?
It can be said that life coaching can be similar to a coach on a sports team or a physical trainer. Coaches or trainers are needed in those realms to help hone in on a certain skill or help their players or clients be more proficient at achieving a certain goal.
Life coaching is similar but also very different. Life coaching specifically centers around a person's life and their specific life goals. The kind of life coaching I am invested in involves (among many other things) transforming the thought patterns, beliefs and stories we have been taught, told or seen around us. Life coaching is not only about changing people's lives but guiding and teaching skills for long term transformation.
I believe life coaching is immensely helpful because many in today's Western society were not taught or modeled healthy ways to cope with the struggles and pain of life, and sometimes even happiness or success. For instance, a statistic that blew my mind recently was that 83% of families have dysfunctional or unhealthy ways of communicating. 83%!
Another piece of research cited ...
96 percent of all families to be to some degree 'dysfunctional' - that is, the system by which the family interacts is distorted by the addictions and compulsions of one or more members and, so, ignores the needs of each individual....It is the 'don't trust, don't feel' rules in such families that lead the children into their own self-destructive patterns. . . . *
96 percent! Therefore, 96% of Americans are in need of some kind of guidance and education on healthy ways of communicating; challenging perceptions and beliefs; become aware of and changing behavioral habits and patterns instead of acting like "everything is okay", "I got this", and "everything is just perfect".
Here are some other examples on why guidance and support from a coach (or therapist) are a must in today's society:
+ Addiction in all realms is continuously on the rise, whether that’s an addiction to substances, people, social media, online dating, sex, food, shopping, porn, etc. Breeding a culture that attempts to both numb and control.
+ The the need for instant gratification, immediate success & grandiose expectations (of ourselves and others).
+ Many people are struggling with their internal dialogue, unhealthy behaviors, dis-ease, irrational and unrealistic decision making, and mindlessness that breeds disconnection and self-sabotage.
+ Overworking to a point of overwhelming stress and anxiety.
+ Inability to stay still or sit with ourselves.
I could go on and on.
Simply said, we all have our "bag of shit" we need to unpack and work through, and this is where a life coach can come in.
I help my clients sift through their "bag of shit" while also guiding, reprogramming and teaching new ways of thinking and living for long term success – essentially reprogramming new identities.
When you work with me, your life will not only change in front of both our eyes, but you will also have the tools to be your own personal coach and inspiration. You will learn how to have success for the long term.
I always tell my clients that I’m not here for the short term game, I’m here for the long term game. I’m here to support you and guide you throughout all of it. Every step of the way.
How do I know if Life Coaching is for me?
I find my own personal experience to be helpful here...
I have seen therapists on and off for the past 10+ years of my life. I have seen therapists for sexual trauma, unhealthy relationships, anxiety, body image and self worth, as well as work/life balance. Therapy was so helpful and needed in my life at certain times.
However, there came a time where...
I was tired of talking and I wanted something more.
I wanted, I needed, to get into action. I wanted someone to advise me on what to do - to give me guidance, provide me with resources specifically for me and my needs, keep me accountable to my goals and life transformation. This is where my biggest shift happened.
I decided I wanted something more and I found that a coach was what I had been looking for.
I also found a coach that was perfect for me. If you find someone and you have a great connection with them, work with them. No matter what you have to do, make it happen.
Connection, I believe, is everything.
It is okay to look around at other coaches and see who will be a good fit for you. Coaching is an investment so make sure you are loving what the person is putting out there before you work with them.
Coaching or Therapy?
Coaching is not for everyone and that is okay. For this blog post, I wanted to discuss how I believe coaching is different than therapy. I have been involved in both capacities and both have served their purposes during times of struggle, pain, and joy in my life. (We do not have to be living in a state of struggle or pain to reach out to a coach...many of us feel "okay" but it's when we know we were meant for more - to feel more, to be more to ourselves and the people around us - that's when it all comes together).
Coaching is primarily future focused. Coaching does look at the past – past trauma, difficult events and grief. I actually love working with individuals who do have past trauma and grief, which I believe is 100% of people (that's another blog post). However, we do not stay there. We do not process or sift through these events. We talk about each event, see if it’s keeping any part of you from moving forward. We see if you’re still holding on to the past and if it is manifesting as ‘stuck points’ in your life, in your body. We will then do some release work through ceremony, meditation, breath work and body movement. This can be and is very powerful. And then, we will let it go. It will no longer have a hold on you and you will be able to move forward into the life of your dreams.
This is where coaching is different. Most therapeutic techniques are centered around processing and reworking the past. Sitting in it, working through it and rewriting the past. I have done this work and, like I said, it was helpful and imperative in certain times of my life. I would recommend if you haven't done this work yet, see what it feels like for you and then move from there. However, if you find someone you connect with and love their work, then work with them. Do what feels good to you in the moment, listen to your gut, listen to your intuition and make a decision from there. Don't think too much about it. Don't think about the how. The how will come with time. Please know that you have all the answers you need inside of you. Sometimes we need a leader to help listen to that inner guide, that intuition, and support us through those times of fear and scarcity.
How does Life Coaching work?
You can begin by asking yourself: How willing am I to change? On a scale from 1-10?
(10 being very willing and 1 not at all). It is important to be honest with yourself, and know, I only work with people who are at least a 6 or above. The willingness to change and take action is important in our work together.
The next step would be to book a free, no obligation Clarity Call to make sure we are good fit, or you can go ahead and book a 60 Minute Deep Dive Client Session to begin our work together. It's that simple.
I currently a few different options for us to work together:
FRONTLINE - Heart-Centered Coaching Calls (donation-based) for medical and mental health providers/practitioners on the frontlines - CLICK HERE to learn more & to schedule
In-Person Sessions in St. Louis - CLICK HERE to learn more
Private Virtual Sessions - CLICK HERE to learn more & to schedule
+ I coach clients on how to start their own coaching or side hustle business on a weekly or
+ I coach therapists, counselors and mental health professionals on how to bring in breath work, meditation and spirituality into their practice.
+ I coach mental health and medical professionals on how to cope with stress, vicarious trauma, burn out, and emotional & life management.
I hope this post was helpful to you. I do not consider myself an expert in this because who is an expert in anything really? I believe I am a forever student - continuing to learn and grow throughout this life. I will attempt to answer any questions you may have. If I do not know the answer, I will try to find it the best way I can.
If you love what I’m doing and what I have to say. Reach out.
Let’s find a way to work together and transform your life or the lives of the people you work with.
Thank you for taking the time to read this post.
As always, please reach out with any questions you have.
All the light, love & gratitude,
#transformation #lifecoach #lifecoaching #coachingvstherapy #reachout #worktogether #identitywork #identityshift #letgo #release #move #coachingprogram #takeinspiredaction #dysfunctional #empowerment #guide #lead #letsdothis